Sugar Alert!!!!

Egad! We have a crisis on our hands.....the Beeb says America's running out of sugar!!! An urgently distressed letter dashed off the the US Agriculture Secretary, with the dire warning "our nation will virtually run out of sugar". Quelle horreur!! I feel faint. This cataclysmic claim comes from industry itself.... giants like Hershey's, Kraft Foods & General Mills. My wrists move involuntarily, and within seconds, I have a major hand wringing concerto. Oh no! What are we to do?? What ARE we to do??!! This crisis could potential render a sharp blow to obesity figures in North America. Gasp! They might even lose their top ranking in the world's fattest nation states. Businesses will be crippled, people left bereft, the financial sector in even more turmoil if the manufacturers have to pay import tariffs on sugar....

But hark! What is this I read? Jack Roney, Director of the ASA (American Sugar Alliance!! tan ta daan...) insisting "There's absolutely no shortage of sugar here", backing the claim of the US Agriculture department that domestic sugar production were now increasing. My wrists see a respite. It's the stealthy caped crusader, SugarcaneMan!! Hurrah! We've been saved!! Delivered from that gut wrenching evil, sugar free, healthy diet!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/8200515.stm

Now that we've narrowly averted a calamity on par with the one loosely referred to as global warming, I shall return to focusing my energies on the pandemic that is human stupidity, making itself felt most particularly in Pune and Mumbai over that openly arrogant killer, swine flu. 27 lives in a population of 1 billion. Unacceptable!! Just because the UK loses 6,000 odd to regular influenza every year is hardly consolation. After all, we did gain independence from the crown this day 62 years ago. We shall throw sense to the four winds (Jayal and I agreed yesterday that common sense is a fallacy. A myth. No such thing. Figment of one's imagination. What she and I possess in abundance is uncommon sense), and shut down schools, public entertainment and boost the EBITA for mask manufacturers and pharma companies. Time to beat the recession.

Moral of the story: If ten thousand people say a stupid thing, it is still a stupid thing.