The two C's

Victory at last!

My mother and I have had a running argument about life and how one makes compromises, especially in relationships. At least, that's what she's always said, and I've vehemently disagreed. Life isn't about compromises, it's about choices. Potato, potato? Hardly. A compromise suggests giving something up, a concession, agreeing to a middle ground... it's a defensive stance, a conciliatory one. Choice is active. You pick one over another, you don't settle to keep the peace... it's an aggressive decision willing to deal with the ramifications. The former implies if you don't do it, you are nothing but stubborn or narrow minded, unable to see beyond your blinkers. The latter, is after you've weighed what the options are, you've decided which one you want more. There's nothing passive about it. Even inertia is a choice.

So many lives in limbo, potential unfulfilled, absence of joy blamed on the circumstances surrounding one's life. It's not easy to change, but not being easy, doesn't make staying any less a choice. I can sympathise with difficult circumstances, but I can't empathise. If I'm that unhappy with them, I do have a choice, to accept it, and live it with grace, or rail against it kicking and screaming till I can change it. It's partly about persona, but a lot of it is just attitude.... they way you've been taught to think... about what's right, and what's not... the belief that it's meant to be vs. the power of making your life what you want it to be.

The woman agrees with me. Hallelujah! Thaarty nine years to success!!