EDF Energy 1 - Apara Guha 0

The flurry of bright sunny days, blue skies marred by frolicking white clouds gently braises my brain into submission at the collective euphoria of an early summer. My culinary ministrations are rudely set asunder (I like that word; asunder) by an extortionate demand from EDF Energy. Cheerful graphs inform me that my consumption for this quarter is higher than it was for the same time last year. It gladdens my heart to see my money so well spent on educational reform in the UK. It does however, have the effect of nudging the solitary un-poached intelligence nodule in my brain. I haven’t turned my heating off yet…. So without further ado, I do.

The early summer shines on unabated, boots get traded in for sandals, silk pj’s give way to nothing, umbrellas to sunglasses and I wallow. Wallow in a perfect spring. And even the seven degrees that delineates sun from shade leaves me only mildly aggravated at having to carry an outer layer. My hubris is met with an undignified slap of cold air as I sashay from a steaming bath. Hmmmm – my last nodule of intelligence is registering an anomaly. One ought to feel hot after a shower, not cold. I turn an investigative eye to the open window. My nodule goes into overdrive. Chilly. Cold. Shut it. Now. But my still simmering brain needs more evidence.

Ack! That is what the strangulated sound that emerges from my throat sounds like as my eyes register 5°C on the weather website. The fetching towel and open window ensemble discarded for a hastily retrieved from laundry basked fleecy robe and a window shut with panache look instead. The music lulls me into a toasty sense of security…. Wilted toast as I crawl under the cold sheets. Three and a half minutes before I root through my drawer for night wear. Nine minutes and a quarter before I root through the laundry basket. Perhaps mid April really isn’t the best time to switch off the heating…..